Generated by All in One SEO v4.9.8, this is an llms.txt file, used by LLMs to index the site. # Samantha Merry Psychotherapy and Supervision ## Sitemaps - [XML Sitemap](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/sitemap.xml): Contains all public & indexable URLs for this website. ## Posts - [When you've lost both parents to one act of violence: What therapy offers adults bereaved by parental domestic homicide](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2026/05/13/when-youve-lost-both-parents-to-one-act-of-violence-what-therapy-offers-adults-bereaved-by-parental-domestic-homicide/) - A report published this week by researchers at the University of Edinburgh and University of Melbourne brings into focus one of the most overlooked forms of childhood bereavement: growing up after one parent has killed the other. It is a subject that rarely surfaces in public conversation, and when it does, the child's experience is - [When Your Family Looked Fine from the Outside](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2026/05/31/when-your-family-looked-fine-from-the-outside/) - You had a roof over your head, you went on holidays, and nobody hit anyone. From the outside, your family looked perfectly ordinary, maybe even enviable. Yet something never felt quite right. You learnt early to read the room, to know what mood a parent was in before you even opened the front door. You - [Which Therapy Is Best for Developmental Trauma?](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2024/09/30/which-therapy-is-best-for-developmental-trauma/) - Which Therapy Is Best for Developmental Trauma? It's a reasonable question to ask before you start. You want to use your time and money well. You want to find something that will actually work, not just something that sounds plausible. The honest answer is that no single therapy works for everyone, and the research reflects - [Writing for Wellbeing: Therapeutic Writing to Process Trauma](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/04/08/writing-for-wellbeing-therapeutic-writing-to-process-trauma/) - While talking therapies can be incredibly valuable, therapeutic writing offers another powerful way to explore and understand your experience. - [Clinical Supervision: A Relational Perspective](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/03/22/the-dance-of-clinical-supervision-a-relational-perspective/) - Clinical supervision is a dynamic, relational process that involves multiple interconnected roles. - [Psychotherapy for Dissociation: Understanding and Healing Through Trauma Therapy](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/03/16/psychotherapy-for-dissociation-understanding-and-healing-through-trauma-therapy/) - What is Dissociation? Dissociation is a psychological response where a person feels disconnected from themselves or their surroundings. - [Choosing the Right Therapist for You](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/02/27/choosing-the-right-counsellor-for-you/) - Choosing the Right Therapist for You Finding the right therapist takes more thought than most people expect. You're not just looking for someone qualified, you're looking for someone you can be honest with, someone whose way of working suits the kind of difficulties you're bringing, and someone whose presence makes the room feel safe enough to do that work. This guide - [When Your Body Remembers What You'd Rather Forget](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2024/12/31/physical-and-emotional-signs-of-unhealed-trauma/) - You've probably made peace, at least on the surface, with your past. You don't dwell on it. You function well. But your body hasn't necessarily received the same memo. You carry tension you can't account for. You're exhausted in a way that sleep doesn't touch. Your stomach is unpredictable. You startle easily. A particular tone - [Is It Ever Too Late to Heal From Childhood Trauma?](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2024/11/30/is-it-ever-too-late-to-heal-from-childhood-trauma/) - The question often arrives quietly, somewhere in midlife or later. You've managed. You've built a life, maintained relationships, met your responsibilities. And yet something hasn't shifted, a persistent sense of not quite fitting, of relationships following the same patterns, of a self that never fully settled. You find yourself wondering whether the window for change - [Recognising Unhealed Developmental Trauma: When the Past Won't Stay in the Past](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2024/10/28/recognising-the-symptoms-of-unhealed-trauma/) - You probably don't think of yourself as traumatised. That word tends to conjure something dramatic, something you'd know about. But developmental trauma rarely arrives with that kind of clarity. It seeps into the background of adult life and starts to look like personality. You're the anxious one, the one who finds relationships hard, the one - [Developmental Trauma and C-PTSD: Understanding the Difference](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2024/09/07/how-is-developmental-trauma-different-from-c-ptsd/) - You might be wondering how is Developmental Trauma different from C-PTSD (Complex PTSD), or are Developmental Trauma and Complex PTSD (C-PTSD) the same thing... - [Finding Your Way Through Trauma: A Guide to Different Therapeutic Approaches](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2026/01/15/finding-your-way-through-trauma-a-guide-to-different-therapeutic-approaches/) - For some, Trauma shows up in the body, as tension, exhaustion, or feeling “on edge.” For others, it shows up in thoughts, emotions, or relationships. - [Burnout Psychotherapy: Finding Your Way Back from the Edge](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/12/28/burnout-psychotherapy-finding-your-way-backfrom-the-edge/) - Burnout rarely announces itself clearly. It tends to accumulate quietly, in the gap between what you're giving and what you're getting back, until the point where ordinary demands start to feel unmanageable and the capacity to recover between them has gone. It doesn't always look dramatic. Often it looks like someone who is still functioning, - [When Insight Stalls: Understanding the Stuckness of Trauma Therapy](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/12/09/when-insight-isnt-enough-the-stuckness-of-trauma-therapy/) - When Insight Isn't Enough: The Stuckness of Trauma Therapy There's a moment that happens often in trauma therapy, not necessarily at the start, and not always in crisis, when someone says with calm clarity: "I now understand why I feel like this, but I still feel like this."Both of us nod. Because that sentence is - [Therapy Isn’t a Life Hack (Sorry About That)](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/11/18/therapy-isnt-a-life-hack-sorry-about-that/) - Why long-term psychotherapy asks for time, not shortcuts What most people secretly want from therapy is a reliable shortcut. A focused set of techniques that produces results within a defined timeframe. That's understandable, and it's also not quite what long-term psychodynamic therapy offers. The kind of work I do, relational, attachment-based, and trauma-informed, is slow - [Avoidance in Therapy: Why It Matters and What It's Telling You](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/10/28/avoidance-isnt-the-enemy-its-the-weather-system/) - Avoidance in psychotherapy and why it’s important Avoidance is one of the most misunderstood things that happens in therapy. It tends to get framed as a problem to overcome, a sign that someone isn't ready, or isn't trying hard enough. That framing is wrong, and it does real damage. Avoidance is a signal. When it - [Single Session Therapy - one time support when you need it](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/10/16/single-session-therapy/) - Single Session Therapy: Why One Conversation Can Be Enough Not every difficulty requires long-term therapy. Sometimes what you need is one focused conversation, space to think clearly, a different perspective, and the relief of saying out loud what's been circling in your head. That's what Single Session Therapy offers. Single Session Therapy, sometimes called ad - [When Dissociation Shows Up in Therapy: Making Room for Flight, Freeze and Shutdown](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/10/07/when-dissociation-shows-up-in-therapy-making-room-for-flight-freeze-and-shutdown/) - Why the urge to leave, or disappear, is a meaningful part of the work There are moments in therapy when something in you says: I have to get out of here. Your legs want to move, your chest tightens, and part of you is already planning the exit. It doesn't always look dramatic from the - [Thinking Instead of Feeling: How the Mind Keeps Us Safe](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/09/16/thinking-instead-of-feeling-how-the-mind-keeps-us-safe/) - Thinking Instead of Feeling: How the Mind Keeps Us Safe - [Trauma Bonding: Why We Stay and How to Begin Leaving](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/08/26/why-we-stay-understanding-trauma-bonding-without-judgement-or-jargon/) - Have you found yourself defending someone who treated you badly, or feeling loyal to a person whose care was unreliable at best and harmful at worst? That experience is more common than most people realise, and it has a name: trauma bonding. Trauma bonding develops when harm and connection become entangled in the same relationship. - [Our bodies remember what our minds try to silence](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/08/05/our-bodies-remember-what-our-minds-try-to-silence/) - A stiff neck, a clamped jaw, a hollow ache in the chest that has no obvious cause. Most of us have learned to explain these away as bad posture or getting older. Sometimes that's accurate. Sometimes the body is holding something the mind hasn't found words for yet. People who come to therapy often say - [Writing as a Bridge Between Body and Mind](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/07/15/writing-as-a-bridge-between-body-and-mind/) - There's a particular frustration that comes from trying to explain how you feel and coming up blank. Your mouth and your mind seem to be working from different scripts. For people living with the effects of complex trauma, especially those who dissociate, that's not a loose description. It's biology. When the nervous system is under - [What if Writing Could Be a Way In?](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/07/06/what-if-writing-could-be-a-way-in/) - Not everyone finds it easy to talk. For some, sitting face-to-face and trying to explain the inner world means words vanish before they arrive, sentences falter, and the thing you most need to say stays just out of reach. Something different can happen when a pen hits the page. Therapeutic writing offers a space where - [Reasons to Consider Therapy?](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/06/01/reasons-to-consider-therapy/) - Here are eleven reasons to consider therapy - [Finding Your Way Through Complicated Grief](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/05/15/finding-your-way-through-complicated-grief/) - Grief is a natural response to loss, but when it feels unending, overwhelming, or tangled with emotions that don't seem to belong to ordinary mourning, it may be what's known as complicated grief. This form of bereavement can feel isolating, particularly when the people around you expect you to have moved on. If you're carrying - [Therapy is not a passive cure!](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/04/24/therapy-is-not-a-passive-cure/) - Therapy is not a quick fix or a passive cure. It requires active effort and commitment from the client. When you're struggling, it's tempting to hope therapy will sort things out the way a prescription does. You show up, someone applies their expertise, and you leave fixed. That's not what therapy is, and understanding the - [I Can’t Afford Therapy Right Now](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2025/01/31/i-cant-afford-therapy-right-now/) - If you’re dealing with developmental trauma but can’t afford therapy right now, it can feel discouraging. However, healing is still possible through self-help. - [When Everyone Else Comes First: Psychotherapy for Carers](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2026/05/19/when-everyone-else-comes-first-psychotherapy-for-carers/) - You are the one who manages the appointments, tracks the medication, fields the calls from school, sits with the diagnosis, absorbs the fear, and keeps things running. You are probably very good at it. And you are probably exhausted in a way that is hard to explain to people who have not lived it. This - [The Grief Nobody Sees: Mourning Losses That Don't Count](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2026/05/07/the-grief-nobody-sees-mourning-losses-that-dont-count/) - There is a kind of grief that does not get a card. No one brings you food. No one asks how you are doing three months later. You do not get time off work, or flowers, or a socially sanctioned reason to cry. And yet something real has gone. Something that mattered, deeply, to you. - [When Someone You Love Has a Problem with Alcohol or Drugs](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2026/04/23/when-someone-you-love-has-a-problem-with-alcohol-or-drugs/) - This post is not about addiction. It is about you. It is about what it is like to love someone whose relationship with alcohol or substances has taken over the room. To watch someone you care about disappear into something you cannot compete with, cannot fix, and cannot make them stop. To feel furious and - [Why Therapy Is Not Advice, and Why That Matters](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2026/03/16/why-therapy-is-not-advice-and-why-that-matters/) - People often ask me a question that sounds simple. “Why don’t you just tell me what to do?” They ask it after they describe a week of circular thinking. They ask it when they feel trapped between two options that both look bad (or equally good!). They ask it when they feel tired of hearing - [Understanding Your Story: Therapy for Late-Diagnosed Autism and ADHD](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2026/03/28/understanding-your-story-therapy-for-late-diagnosed-autism-and-adhd/) - A late diagnosis often feels like finding the final piece of a puzzle. You might feel relief. You might also feel grief or confusion. Many adults reach this point after years of anxiety, burnout, or a sense that they are "wrong." You are not wrong. You are neurodivergent. Language That Belongs to You Neurodiversity: The natural - [Quiet loneliness in a crowded world](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2026/03/01/quiet-loneliness-in-a-crowded-world/) - How Psychotherapy can help with you feel lonely You can have messages waiting, plans in the diary, maybe a partner at home, colleagues who like you, and still feel oddly alone. Not “I have no one.” More “no one really has me, or no one really gets me.” This kind of loneliness can feel confusing. - [Trauma - what is it and why it matters](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2024/08/25/developmental-trauma/) - Developmental Trauma: When the Past Shows Up in Your Present You function well. You hold down a career, maintain relationships, meet your responsibilities. From the outside, things look fine. But something keeps snagging. You notice a familiar tightening when someone pulls away. A disproportionate shame when you make a mistake. A low-level anxiety that doesn't - [Your Therapy Notes and Police Requests, What Changed and Why It Matters](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2026/01/13/your-therapy-notes-and-police-requests-what-changed-and-why-it-matters/) - You might have read the recent headline’s around Police and Court requests of counselling notes, and felt your stomach drop. The quiet fear that something private could leave the therapy room and end up in someone else’s hands. - [What is a SCID-D Dissocation Assessment?](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2026/02/05/what-is-a-scid-d-assessment/) - Dissociation means you feel disconnected from your thoughts, feelings, memories, body, or surroundings. Your mind shifts away from the present to cope. - [Your Life Has No Pop-Up Blocker, So You Need Boundaries](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2026/02/19/your-life-has-no-pop-up-blocker-so-you-need-boundaries/) - A boundary is a limit that defines you as separate from others. It clarifies what you accept/do not accept, and what you will do if your limits are ignored. - [Healing from Domestic Abuse Is Rarely Linear](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/2026/01/29/healing-from-domestic-abuse-is-rarely-linear/) - Recovery from domestic or family violence isn’t a straight line, it’s a tender, deeply personal journey that unfolds at your own pace. ## Pages - [Home](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/) - Samantha Merry Relational psychodynamic psychotherapy in Bromley and online. Specialist in trauma, dissociation, and therapeutic writing. BACP Senior Accredited - [Research](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/research/) - My academic and professional journey has been driven by a passion for understanding the multifaceted nature of psychological trauma. My research continues this - [About Me](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/about-me/) - About Me This page highlights my career education, professional qualifications and other specific service training undertaken by me. - [Clinical Supervision](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/clinical-supervision/) - Clinical supervision in Bromley and online. Relational psychodynamic approach with specialist experience in trauma and dissociation. BACP Senior Accredited. - [Resources](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/resources/) - If you or someone you know is looking for support and resources, I have compiled the following list of individuals and organisations to help. - [Contact](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/contacts/) - Contact - [Privacy Policy](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/privacy-policy/) - Privacy Policy - [Specialism](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/specialism/) - Specialist psychotherapy in Bromley and online for trauma, dissociation, complex family dynamics, and menopause. Doctoral researcher / BACP Senior Accredited Psychotherapist - [How I Can Help](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/how-i-can-help/) - Psychotherapy in Bromley and online for adults navigating trauma, dissociation, grief, burnout, complex family dynamics, and more. BACP Senior Accredited. - [Frequently Asked Questions](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/frequently-asked-questions/) - Frequently asked questions about psychotherapy with Samantha Merry in Bromley and online. Fees, approach, confidentiality, trauma, dissociation, and therapeutic writing - [Therapeutic Writing](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/therapeutic-writing/) - Therapeutic writing for trauma, dissociation, grief, and emotional wellbeing in Bromley and online. Individual sessions and groups. Research-informed practice. - [Depression](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/depression/) - Depression is more than simply feeling unhappy or fed up for a few days. People can feel sad or empty, they might lose interest in daily activities. - [Anxiety](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/anxiety/) - Anxiety is one of the most common psychological problems for which people seek counselling. Symptoms can include worry, panic and OCD amongst other things. - [Bullying](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/bullying/) - Bullying behaviour can include, amongst other things, being teased in a manner that is hurtful, being humiliated or put down without thought for your feelings. - [Sexual Abuse](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/sexual-abuse/) - Sexual abuse is defined as any type of sexual activity which is unwanted. People who have experienced sexual abuse often feel unable to share their experiences. - [Menopause](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/menopause/) - The added challenges of peri-menopause, menopause, and early menopause on women is very often underestimated. The impact varies greatly between women. - [Trauma what it is](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/trauma/) - Relational psychodynamic therapy for trauma, complex PTSD, and developmental trauma in Bromley and online. Specialist work across the full trauma spectrum including dissociation and DID. - [Grief](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/grief/) - Loss is inevitable for all of us as we progress through life. Grief is not linear; it affects us all in different ways and can resurface when we least expect it - [Online Psychotherapy](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/online-psychotherapy/) - Online psychotherapy via Zoom across the UK. Specialist in trauma, dissociation, and complex presentations. As effective as in-person therapy. Free 15-minute introductory call - [Adult Psychotherapy](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/adult-psychotherapy/) - Adult psychodynamic psychotherapy in Bromley and online. Specialist in trauma, dissociation, and complex presentations. BACP Senior Accredited. £95 per session - [Dissociation](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/dissociation/) - Specialist psychotherapy for dissociation, OSDD, and DID in Bromley and online. Relational psychodynamic therapy across the full dissociative spectrum - [My Blog](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/blog/) - My Blog - [Bereaved by Suicide](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/bereaved-by-suicide/) - To lose a friend or relative by suicide is tragic and can feel complicated and confusing. Very often coming as a complete shock without warning signs. - [Cookie Policy (UK)](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/cookie-policy-uk/) ## Layouts - [Header-1](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/layouts/header-1/) - Samantha MerryPsychotherapy and SupervisionHomeAbout MeServices Adult PsychotherapyOnline PsychotherapySpecialismClinical SupervisionTherapeutic Writing How I Can HelpResearchInformation Frequently Asked QuestionsMy BlogResources Contact MeSamantha MerryPsychotherapy and Supervision - [Footer Default](https://samanthamerry.co.uk/layouts/footer-default/) - SitemapHome About Me Adult Psychotherapy Online Psychotherapy Specialism Clinical Supervision Therapeutic Writing How I Can Help Research Frequently Asked Questions Resources My Blog Contact Privacy Policy Accreditations/Registrations Samantha Merry © {{Y}}. 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