Therapy is not a quick fix or a passive cure. It requires active effort and commitment from the client.
Let’s be honest – when you’re struggling, it’s tempting to hope therapy will be like popping down to Boots for a magic cream that sorts everything. Just show up, let the Bromley psychotherapist do their thing, and walk out fixed. If only, right? The truth is, therapy is more like learning to dance than getting a massage. I’m there with you, but you’ve got to put in the moves too.
It’s a relationship right?
In the therapy room, something powerful happens. We create a professional relationship that becomes the canvas for understanding all your other relationships – past and present. That childhood stuff with your mum? The drama with your partner? The way your boss makes you feel small? It all shows up between us.
But here’s the kicker – I don’t just observe this from afar. I’m in it with you. When you feel angry, sad, confused, or even when you want to push me away – that’s valuable information about patterns you might repeat elsewhere.
The work happens between sessions too!
Some of the most important psychotherapy happens when you’re on the bus home, walking through the high street, or lying in bed thinking about what we discussed. Those moments when something clicks, when you catch yourself repeating an old pattern and think, “Oh, that’s what we were talking about!”
Your task is to notice – really notice – yourself. What triggers you? What defences kick in? What stories do you tell yourself? Bringing these observations back to our next session is where the gold happens.
I’m not the expert on you
Despite my training as a psychotherapist, I’m not the expert on your life. You are. I might offer perspectives, notice patterns, or make connections you haven’t seen yet, but you’re the one who knows if they ring true.
I’m more witness than wizard, more companion than conductor. I can’t (and shouldn’t) fix you, because you’re not broken – you’re human, with human struggles that make perfect sense given your experiences.
The courage to change
It takes serious courage to look at difficult stuff, to question patterns that have protected you for years, to try new ways of being that feel risky.
That’s the work of therapy – showing up, being honest, staying curious about yourself, and gradually taking those insights into your daily life.
So no, therapy isn’t a quick, easy fix. It’s a brave journey of self-discovery with someone alongside you who really sees you. And while it requires work, that work creates change that lasts long after our sessions end.
If you wish, contact me.
